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August 29, 2008
Laughing All The Way to the Polls
When I heard this morning that John McCain picked Sarah Palin as his VP running mate, I asked, as did I suspect millions of other people, “Who the heck is Sarah Palin?” Here I was betting breakfast on Lieberman. Mitt Romney must be furious. Maybe he’ll buy another company and outsource all the jobs as temporary solace.
I had no access to The Google at the time, so I was at the mercy of my friends via cell phone to reveal Ms. (oops, I mean “Governor”) Palin’s biography. She’s the governor of Alaska. Like most of you, I might be able to name a half dozen state governors right now, and only because they have been vetted as candidates for VP or were once running for president. Palin wasn’t one of them.
Then I vaguely remembered Palin's role in “TrooperGate,” the current Jerry Springer-esque scandal involving Sarah and her sister’s ex-husband whom she allegedly wanted fired. Various heads rolled and there is an investigation by the Alaskan legislature about abuses of power.
After I learned who Palin was, I laughed and laughed. I thought it was a great joke. When I was told it was true and that my sources were *not* making this up, I could only shake my head at such a hilarious choice! McCain picks a woman almost no one recognizes (because if I couldn’t place her, you can bet 99% of the voters haven’t heard of her, either), who is pro-life, pro-gun, pro-fur, pro-drilling in ANWR, pro-Big Oil, pro-BP pipelines (her husband works there), promotes “creationism” and dismisses science in regard to global warming and the impending extinction of polar animals. Not surprisingly, she has a few large, stuffed dead beasts in her living room. I’ll resist adding McClown to that list.
No doubt you’ve heard she was a runner-up in a beauty pageant (and I’ll refrain from any catty remarks about the competition in Wasilla, Alaska, a town a fraction of the size of Pleasantville and headquarters of a dog-sled race). She was the mayor of Wasilla for awhile. That, plus two years as gubner gives her the creds to be one heartbeat away from swearing in as Commander-in-Chief and leader of the World's Most Powerful Nation.
Alrighty!
Governor Palin has five children, including an infant with Down syndrome she bore in her 40s. That, of course, was her choice, but who’s taking care of this gaggle of kids while she works long hours as governor? I’m the last person to knock a gal for having an ambitious and powerful career, but as Vice President of the United States? Something’s mighty wrong with that picture. It’s mind-boggling.
But, what’s worse is the woefully misguided strategy the McCain camp employed to put her on the ticket to attract Hillary’s disgruntled supporters and to use Palin as a progressive prop, while overlooking any number of better qualified Republican women to complement the old POW and his historically misogynistic party. How else would you characterize this insult to women’s intelligence if not insidious disrespect?
Sure, the pundits will be talking about the Palin selection as much or more than the Democratic Convention on Sunday’s shows. They'll spin this as a "maverick" decision and tout Palin's "outsider" status as being "real change," and if you've been paying attention these past few months, you can write the slogans yourself. But, the voters, especially feminists, won’t be fooled.
I, for one, am giddy. I can't wait to see Joe Biden chew her up and spit her out like whale blubber in the VP debate. Yee Haw!
Comments
Christ. I was under the impression that she (sic) was a Monty Python skit, at best.
I'm moving to Guam.
Posted by: Darnell-O-Gram | August 29, 2008 08:38 PM
Totally hilarious interview of Palin and McClown in PEOPLE:
Put down coffee when reading this part:
Sen. McCain, of all the candidates you considered, what drew you to her?
JOHN: Obviously, I found her to be very intelligent and very well-versed on the issues. But I think the important thing was that she's a reformer. She's taken on special interests since she ran for the PTA and the city council and mayor. The courage, I guess, is what most impressed me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I almost choked laughing.
Ok, I have an idea - can we recruit Jane Fonda to be Sarah Palin's voice-over? She needs someone to dub her horrible voice.
Worst. Voice. Ever.
Posted by: loretta | August 30, 2008 01:43 PM
And, furthermore, why hasn't anyone called her (sic) on the carpet for her Thunder Thighs, her chalkboard voice, her Junior Rotary Club oratory, or, most presciently, her attempted infanticide?
Posted by: Darnell-O-Gram | August 30, 2008 05:20 PM
She will alienate women on both sides of the political spectrum: the right-wing religious whose eyebrows will be permanently raised north when they find out she's dragging around her 4-month-old special needs baby on the campaign trail, exposing him to all manner of cooties, disrupted schedules and nursing issues.
The feminists will seriously question her sanity and the Becky Home-Ecky (Lisa's expression) types will think she's a negligent mother.
It's a Lose-Lose.
Posted by: loretta | August 30, 2008 05:28 PM
Gotta see this :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nOVc9djQUFk
Posted by: CountryGal | August 30, 2008 11:06 PM
I wonder who in the press (the FunHouse Mirror Brigade) will posit that feminists will wonder how Palin can reconcile raising her large family (and new baby) with running a (small) state, much less a significant national office.
We know that you can't have it all as a woman with a career - something has to give. In this case, it's obviously Mrs. Palin's children. Most of us working mothers will not relate to her at all. Feminists will bristle at her platforms of fundamentalism, pro-life, anti-environment, and pro-gun (although some of us gals don't have a problem with gun ownership, especially in the wilds of Alaska).
On the other side, I know that the Dr. Laura school of motherhood (to which many of my Christian women friends subscribe) might be impressed with Palin's values, but appalled by her willingness to abandon her children for an ambitious job like governor, and would seriously question her "walk" if she thinks that it's ok for her to have the Village raise the special needs child so she can globe trot and learn how to govern a country by the seat of her pantsuit.
Nope. In my opinion, it can't fly.
I never much liked Hillary, although I grudgingly respect her talents and experience, but let's face it: Palin can't carry Hill's Earth Shoe across the street at this point. I doubt Palin will attract many Hillary supporters.
Posted by: loretta | August 31, 2008 11:25 AM
McCain must think women vote based on body parts alone. Palin is the anti-Hillary.
I predict Ms Palin will decide she wants to spend more time with her family. The trick for the GOP will be to try and somehow blame Obama.
Posted by: CountryGal | August 31, 2008 11:53 AM
This only makes it more important for all of us to get out and get people to register to vote and then really go and vote
Posted by: Flowermaven | August 31, 2008 01:00 PM
The PEOPLE article didn't go over any of Palin's qualifications for VP. From the article, I'd me more inclined to hire her as a nanny. Although she does boast an impressive list of muli-tasking talents. Lugging around her baby, a breast pump and several pounds of moose hot dogs while wearing those peep toe pumps and maintaining a perfect French manicure has got to count for something.
I'd love to see a female VP, but one with the right qualifications. Sarah Palin just doesn't fit the bill. Throwing her out there to try and save his campaign is an insult to women everywhere.
Was I mistaken, or did his eyes seem glued to Palin's bustline as he nervpously twisted his wedding band during that entire YouTube video from CountryGal?
I do believe McCain has just committed political suicide, as sure as if he were a Kamikaze pilot.
Posted by: Nadine | August 31, 2008 02:05 PM
Oh, and a big shout out to Luanne up there! Hey, Maven!
Posted by: loretta | August 31, 2008 10:59 PM
If choosing her is going to be his downfall, then I don't mind so much.
His choice makes him look like a total twat!
Posted by: Mgt | September 1, 2008 05:09 AM
No way is this woman 6 mos pregnant in this picture:
Plus she flew 11 hours at 8 mos, that baby was over 6# when born? No way. Either that baby is her daughter's (and the story is growing legs) or it's adopted.
Posted by: loretta | September 1, 2008 12:02 PM
Whooooah.
Bristol Palin, age 17, is pregnant:
How inconvenient.
Posted by: loretta | September 1, 2008 01:41 PM
I can't believe she would let her daughter suffer the ordeal of the publicity. I can't imagine what this girl is going through, and it's just the beginning. Knowing that this was the case before accepting the VP offer?
Something just doesn't add up, or else Governor P has rocks in her head.
Posted by: loretta | September 1, 2008 02:28 PM
IMO, this is just smoke to cover up the fact that the Baby Trig is her daughter's son (Bristol). Being pregnant now would mean that Bristol wasn't able to be pregnant with Baby Trig (the youngest of Governor P kids, the one with Down Syndrome) before. I believe something "magical" will be happening to this pregnancy. If you know what I mean.
Something that I have been following http://www.dailykos.com/storyonly/2008/8/30/121350/137/486/580223
Posted by: Anne | September 1, 2008 03:46 PM
It's been awhile since I've been here and Loretta, still see you as fiesty as ever! *grin*
Perhaps, having a little known female, family in tow, might seem appealing to McCain as it may bring the much needed "balance" between a much beloved Obama and a harsher lined Republican image? Perhaps, the image in McCain's mind for the public of a Republican valued woman who is managing not only a family but, one with a disabled child and from a distant, harsher area of habitation, running at his side, might bring around women voters and soften his image? Let's face it, Obama is far more palatable image wise than McCain and certainly it appears as though the teeter totter of balance is leaning more on both Obama's softer image as well as Democratic policies for the most part.
This is coming from a Canuck's vantage point, but that's how I see things at this moment anyways.
Fire away! *smile*
Posted by: Louellen | September 1, 2008 10:06 PM
Hello Loretta! Just had to get your take on this crazy Palin stuff.
Not only is Ms. Abstinence Education only's 17 year old daughter pregnant (what kind of mother would put her teenager through this national scrutiny?), she headed Ted Stevens' PAC, was a member of the Alaska Independence Party (which believes Alaska should secede from the US! -- motto "Alaska First and Always", ran up a huge debt as Mayor of Podunk. Thomasina Eagleton?
Posted by: Texdude | September 1, 2008 11:06 PM
Yep. The hits just keep on comin'.
Hilarious. I haven't stopped lauging since Friday morning.
Posted by: loretta | September 1, 2008 11:10 PM
Except when I read stuff like this:
LINL which the media should probably spend its time covering far more than Northern Exposure Meets Jerry Springer.
Posted by: loretta | September 1, 2008 11:17 PM
Poor Bristol, looking for attention and affection and landed herself in trouble. Now, all this humiliation.
That little girl needs more than a marriage to a boy she probably doesn't really love. Support of the entire family? My arse!
Like shutting the stable door once the horse has bolted, I reckon.
Posted by: Mgt | September 2, 2008 04:21 AM
BTW, I really like Obama's response.
Posted by: Mgt | September 2, 2008 04:22 AM
History repeats:
"Palin eloped with husband-to-be Todd, on Aug. 29, 1988. They said it was to save their parents the expense of a wedding, but closer to the truth is that she was pregnant - their first son Track was born on April 20, 1989, less than 8 months after they eloped."
Posted by: Astrologer | September 2, 2008 11:26 AM
Wonder how McCain's "tick" is doing these days. lol
He looks like a turtle with a twitch.
Posted by: Mgt | September 2, 2008 12:14 PM
Media Should Back Off Bristol Palin, Obama Says:
http://blogs.reuters.com/trail08/2008/09/01/media-should-back-off-bristol-palin-obama-says/
“People’s families are off-limits and people’s children are especially off-limits,” Obama told reporters following a campaign event in Monroe, Michigan. “This shouldn’t be part of our politics. It has no relevance to Gov. Palin’s performance as a governor or potential performance as a vice president. So I would strongly urge people to back off these kinds of stories,” he added.
There was no evidence Obama’s campaign had any role in stoking a rumor that Bristol Palin was actually the mother of Palin’s four-month-old. Reporters traveling with the campaign had been fascinated by the talk for days. Obama’s press aides even told reporters the rumors seemed far-fetched and they would have nothing to say about them.
A senior McCain campaign aide was quoted in the Reuters story as suggesting that Obama’s campaign was linked to the bloggers who were spreading the rumors.
“I am offended by that statement,” Obama said when asked about it by a reporter. “There is no evidence at all that any of this involved us. Our people were not involved in any way in this and they will not be,” he added. “And if I ever thought there was somebody in my campaign that was involved in something like that, they’d be fired.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lW_p6eBSKKE
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Posted by: Nadine | September 2, 2008 02:14 PM
I feel badly for the daughter. She just got thrown under the RNC bus on this.
No matter how you approach this, it's a heck of a choice, sure to offend every type of woman. Good job, Neo-Cons!
Posted by: Lisa | September 2, 2008 04:52 PM
Latest from the McClown campaign - manager Rick Davis says Palin won't be available for interviews because the media is not behaving. Plus, the campaign is "not about issues," it's about personalities.
Wow. I thought not long ago that was a Faux talking point against LibRels.
Up is Down, Black is White, Night is Day, Karl Rove is in the kitchen.
Posted by: loretta | September 2, 2008 05:07 PM
Nadine, he was looking at her tush while twirling his wedding ring. Y.U.K. Budweiser Barbie needs to watch out for Yukon Barbie.
Loretta can make this much better, but here's my version:
McCain as old as time
True as it can be
Barely even friends
Then somebody bends
Unexpectedly
Just a little change
Small to say the least
Pubs a little scared
Neither one prepared
Beauty and the Beast
More of just the same
Not even a surprise
Ever as before
Ever just as sure
As the sun will rise
McCain as old as time
Tune as old as song
Bittersweet and strange
Finding you can change
Learning you were wrong
Certain as the sun
Rising in the east
McCain as old as time
Song as old as rhyme
Beauty and the Beast
McCain as old as time
Song as old as rhyme
Beauty and the Beast
Posted by: CountryGal | September 2, 2008 05:20 PM
CGal, great lyrics! All those grandkids over last w-e paid off!
Palin's car wash bizis in non-compliance and undeclared on her gubernatorial disclosure filings:
http://voices.washingtonpost.com/the-trail/2008/09/02/palin_scrubbing_car_wash.html
And get her other biz; "... a marketing business which was to go by the name Rouge Cou, which evidently is a literal French translation of "red neck."
Posted by: Astrologer | September 2, 2008 10:14 PM
Can't get that "Car Wash" song outta my head.
...workin' at the car wash, yeah!
Sheesh. Can't even get rudimentary paperwork filed for a rinky dink carwash in 'Laska.
Wow. This is their VP candidate? Hahahaha!
Posted by: loretta | September 2, 2008 10:23 PM
Get your barf bags ready, Palin speaks tonight at the Republican Convention, and Ghouliani will deliver the keynote address.
Posted by: Nadine | September 3, 2008 02:20 PM
Born in Bonner County in Idaho,
Didn’t live there long, as a baby she would go
huntin’ in Alaska where she knew every tree,
And shot her a bunny when she was only three.
Sarah, Sarah Palin Queen of the GOP.
Fought single handed through the PTA wars,
And the librarian was whipped and creationism was restored.
And while she was handling this risky chore,
Made herself a legend, forevermore.
Sarah, Sarah Palin the hockey mom the Fundies adore.
She went off to City Council and served a spell
Fixin' up the government and laws as well.
Became mayor of Wasilla, I heard tell,
And left them with a $20 million farewell.
Sarah, Sarah Palin, the GOP’s new mademoiselle.
Posted by: CountryGal | September 3, 2008 04:17 PM
That's dang good, CG.
hahaha
I have got to write one.
Posted by: loretta | September 3, 2008 04:31 PM
Oh! I can't wait!
How about doing Chain of Fools?
McCain, Cain, Cain....
Posted by: CountryGal | September 3, 2008 04:35 PM
BTW, CG's song was written to the tune of DAVY CROCKETT.
Click on above for a really lame midi. haha
Posted by: loretta | September 3, 2008 04:48 PM