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September 03, 2008
Take A Chance On Me
It's been a long time since I've written a song parody, but this Palin fiasco begged for a spoof. In honor of John McCain's reported preference for ABBA, allow me to destroy one of their famous songs for your amusement:
Since you’ve lost your mind, I'm the first in line
I’ll be your V.P.
Take a chance on me
When I’m not out burnin’ books I’m a hockey mom
Yeah, I’ve got the smarts and looks, honey, I’m the bomb
If you need a bump, ‘cause your party’s in the dump
I’ll be your Emcee
Take a chance on me
Gonna woo the workin’ class and the Bible crowd
‘Cause I ain’t no shirkin’ lass, yeah, I’ll do ya proud
Take a chance on me
Take a chance on me
We’ll be campaigning, sippin’ Champaign when we hit the road together
Never mind the vetting, there is no regretting when you know me better
‘Cause you know I've got
So much that I wanna win for the state where my heart is in:
Alaska!
You want some of Clinton’s fans? Someone with a family plan?
Yes, I’ve got some sway
With the PTA
If you can’t have Joe, I'm the best in show
I’ll learn at your knee
(Miss) Congeniality
With the First Dude’s Yamaha ready for the snow
Got my brand new passport now, all my kids in tow
If your base is gone and the press is on your case,
I’ll be your V.P.
Take a chance on me
Gonna wow the chin-up guys and the workin’ gals
I will be the pinup girl for your GI pals.
Take a chance on me
Take a chance on me
Oh please don’t take too long, Johnny, I ain’t Giuliani, know I won’t confuse you
You don’t wanna vet me, if you just let me, I will not refuse you
Let me tell you now
I know my loyalty, you know I’m nearly royalty
in Alaska!
The press says I’m just a hick, but you can’t find a better pick
I ain’t just some chick
I’m a maverick!
Since you’ve lost your mind, I'm the first in line
I’ll be your V.P.
Take a chance on me
When I’m not out firing folks, I’m endangerin’ bears
Got a pipeline in the works, yeah we need your prayers
If you need a bump, ‘cause your party’s in the dump
I’ll be your Emcee
Take a chance on me
Gonna woo the workin’ class and the Bible crowd
‘Cause I ain’t no shirkin’ lass, yeah, I’ll do ya proud
Comments
Classic Loretta!
Oh please don’t take too long, Johnny, I ain’t Giuliani..
Priceless!
Posted by: CountryGal | September 3, 2008 06:43 PM
Ok, the new midi link works. It's so perfect for this silly stuff.
Posted by: loretta | September 3, 2008 06:47 PM
Great songs, CG and Loretta.
I spent quite a while this afternoon looking at pictures and reading about Palin.
I am convinced that baby is her grandson. Until I'm shown a birth record from the hospital, I'm going to believe she's the granny, not the mommy.
A brith record versus a certificate because if they adopted the baby, it would be an amended certificate listing them as parents. Although, you can often tell on adoptees birth certificates because the filing date may be three or four months after the birth.
Which could also explain why she just doesn't produce one. She may not have the amended certificate yet.
She's supposed to be five months pregnant in that pictures? Uh, NO. Five minutes, five days, I could buy, but not five months.
Posted by: Lisa | September 3, 2008 08:13 PM
Dr. Laura weighs in:
I was telling someone the other day what I thought Dr. Laura would say. And, here she is. Heck, I'm psychic.
Posted by: loretta | September 3, 2008 09:00 PM
A letter from someone from Palin's home town of Wasilla:
Posted by: Astrologer | September 3, 2008 10:00 PM
Between Mitt, Huck and Rudi911 I lost my appetite. A noun, a verb, and a lie.
Posted by: CountryGal | September 3, 2008 10:28 PM
I can't even watch Ghouliani and his Crypt-Keeper smile. Ghah! With the backdrop of NYC. Blech.
He's got to be in the top 5 most abhorrent human beings on earth.
I turned Palin off after about 10 minutes. Zzzzz
While the DNC convention was sometimes a snoozefest, it had some really entertaining moments. The republicans are humorless, joyless, robots.
Posted by: loretta | September 3, 2008 10:55 PM
That baby Trig is doped up!
Posted by: Astrologer | September 3, 2008 11:11 PM
Mean, nasty speeches tonight and the Tundra Tart was the worst.
The choices are so clear. Republicans laughed and scorned the poor, belittled community service, and lied through their fangs.
Their "prosperity" signs say it all. $$$$$$$$$$ is their god and the less fortunate are only looking for a handout.
To hear Palin, she's going to go to WDC to do nothing. That's her view of government.
And none of them want to own the last pathetic 8 years of GOP failure.
/rant
Posted by: CountryGal | September 3, 2008 11:47 PM
I thought so too, Astro!
Posted by: Lisa | September 4, 2008 07:20 AM
I'm going to avoid reading much commentary before I give my impressions so I'm not influenced by anything.
Palin has a terrible voice, and I'm not the only one who thinks so. This is such an important thing for a woman in a large role like this to have a great voice. She is really hard to listen to, even if I liked what she had to say.
I'm not sure why being a Pit Bull with lipstick is a good thing right now, but I guess the testosterone card is the only one that team can play. I guess being diplomatic and restrained is somehow sissy.
I really don't think that attitude is attractive to most voters, and they sure won't win any Indies or Dems that way.
Look what that kind of aggressive policy led us to? We're broke.
The emphasis on "energy" (and not the clean kind) is just running us over once again. Living the delusion that they can burn oil and coal forever, damn the environment, too bad it will continue to rise in cost.
She's much more conniving and manipulative than the average viewer will realize. I don't trust her as far as I can throw her. She's rotten to the core.
Posted by: loretta | September 4, 2008 07:57 AM
Therefore, she fits right in.
I can't imagine her helping them win any votes other than the ones they would already have gotten.
She will make no significant impact.
As long as everyone shows up on Election Day, the Democratic Party is a shoe-in.
Posted by: loretta | September 4, 2008 07:59 AM
I watched a Charlie Rose video last night when he had Janet Napolitano and Palin on his program and she was clueless! He was talking about education and asked her about Alaska's policies and she totally ignore the question and started talking about energy and oil. She is a one.trick.pony and it's all about oil and gas.
Her gas pipeline she touts is being built by a Canadian energy company and goes to Canada. Does Canada then get to sell the lower 48 Alaska's gas?
Last night she energized the base alright. Our base. Every forum and blog I read was peppered with people that responded by donating to Obama. He took in big bucks last night thanks to Tundra Tart.
Posted by: CountryGal | September 4, 2008 01:18 PM
Oh and BTW, that jet she said she put on eBay didn't sell on eBay.
But the jet's eBay listing did not prove effective, and the state never got its asking price. Instead, in 2007, the state turned to an aircraft broker, Turbo North Aviation. The jet was purchased that year by businessman Larry Reynolds, the owner of a sporting goods store and marine supply store in Valdez. Reynolds paid $2.1-million.
~~~~
Did she lie? Not technically. That's typical of the "straight talk" we can expect from this ticket.
Posted by: CountryGal | September 4, 2008 01:25 PM
Here's the link to Charlie Rose
http://www.charlierose.com/guests/sarah-palin
Posted by: CountryGal | September 4, 2008 04:35 PM
Thanks for that link, CountryGal. I have to say I wasn't impressed with Palin's response to any of the questions.
Good golly, talk about playing Hot Potato.
Posted by: Nadine | September 4, 2008 08:11 PM
In case you all haven't found it yet, great Alaska blogger with tons of info on Palin.
http://mudflats.wordpress.com/
Posted by: CountryGal | September 4, 2008 08:33 PM